How To Make An Emo Laugh

How To Make An Emo Cry

Alternative Ways To Kill Yourself

Prepare Your Own Emo Funeral

A Day In The Life Of An Emo Kid

Worst Emo Hair Ever

Worst Emo Tattoos EVER!

How To Start An Emo Band!

The Emo Olympics

Your First Date With An Emo Boyfriend

50 Sins Against Emo!

Emo, Religion and God

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Emos are generally fanatical about their religion or Atheism. In this topic I’ll discuss everything that connects Emo and Religion. Was Jesus an Emo? What does God think of Emos who spend all of their days cutting and drinking vodka? Is Heaven full of loose fat emo girls blitzed off their head on booze? Or is that Hell? Will My Chemical Romance be going to Heaven or Hell?

Are the Atheist emos right when they say that there is nothing after death and if so, what is the point in life?

Do Emos Have A Religion? What Do Emos Believe?

Emos are godless Atheists who support fascist regimes, public floggings and the death penalty. They despise everything that is just and Good in the world.

They do not believe in anything but themselves. They are their own Gods.
Church for an Emo is their bedroom. Here they will perform all sorts of depravities to appease the collective [...]

Posted in Emo, Religion and God | 5 Comments »>

Every Time You Masturbate God Kills An Emo Kid

This is a big fib!

The rumor was created by Satanist’s in order to try to promote masturbation amongst heavy metal fans. The idea was that Satanic metallers would dedicate even more time to jerking off, in exchange for God killing an Emo Kid at will.
If this was true there would be no Emo Kid’s left [...]

Posted in Emo, Religion and God | No Comments »>

God Hates Emos. The Truth About Music and Religion.

This is something I’m asked quite regularly. Does God hate Emos? Well the answer is yes and no. He hates how Emos are destroying their bodies.  By cutting themselves to ribbons with knives. By drinking themselves to death. By damaging their hearing whilst listening to Fall Out Boy and My Chemical Romance. Emos seem to [...]

Posted in Emo, Religion and God | 12 Comments »>

Was Jesus A Gay Emo Who Cross Dressed And Prayed To Satan?

The evidence is mounting that our Lord Jesus Christ was an Emo who spent most of His days slapping himself around the head with a piece of wood. Christ who is often depicted in the west as being white, 6 foot 5 and a member of the Republican party in fact wore makeup and loved [...]

Posted in Emo, Religion and God | 18 Comments »>