How To Be An Emo Girl - 10 Steps You Can Take
I never wanted to be an emo girl but my boyfriend keeps insisting that I should make a little more effort to fit in. Why can’t I just be myself? I bet the creepy git wants me to dress up like him. Anyway from the way I see it there are a number of things you can do to become an emo girl.
- Mysteriously contract asthma over night. Run around your house gasping for air until someone pays attention to you and dthen escribe your situation.
- Buy a few crappy band t-shirts, preferrably of Alkaline Trio and My Chemical Romance. You might want to try to customise them with your mothers sewing machine. You gain bonus points for making an absolute mess of the shit but remember it’s all part of your individuality!
- Become a neutoric and overly possessive bitch. Tap your boyfriend’s cellphone and when he comes home late at night interrogate him until he admits that’s he’s a lying ass.
- Invest in a wide range of hair dyes, preferrably one for each day of the week. You should spend all of your evenings, indoors dying your hair again. Don’t worry if massive clumps of your hair begin to fall out after a few weeks. This is perfectly natural.
- Refuse to listen to music on anything but an old vinyl player. If you receive any CD’s as presents, smash them up when you next get a chance.
- Become a feminist. I recommend that you start with the works of Simon De Beauvoir and carry on from there. If your boyfriend asks you what you’re reading then tell him that it’s none of his goddamn business.
- Remember it’s not possible to apply enough foundation onto your skin. Your goal is to look like Morticia out of the Addams Family.
- Whilst we’re on makeup, rouge is a definite no-no. As is any color of lipstick other than black.
- Develop a major crush on the late Bill Hicks and dye all of your clothes black.
- Vow never to have children. When you’re boyfriend brings the topic of kids up, shoot him down. Tell him that you’re fed up with the male species and their oppressive ways.
May 12th, 2007 at 7:27 pm
GIRL DONT LISTEN TO YOURE DAMN BOYFRIEND.IF HE DONT LIKE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE THEN FORGET HIM OKAY.IM SERIOUS.YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO CHANGE WHO YOU ARE JUST BECAUSE YOURE BF THINKS YOU NEED TO FIT IN.I HAD AN EMO BF ONCE AND WE ONLY STAY TOGETHER FOR 5 MONTHS AND THEN HE DUMPED ME CAUSE I WASNT LIKE HIM. IF I WERE YOU I WOULD DUMP YOURE EMO GUY RIGHT NOW BEFORE YOU GET HURT.
May 18th, 2007 at 5:57 pm
I agree with Alyssa.
Don’t change for him.
If he really loved you he wouldn’t want you to change.
You need to find someone who loves you for who you are.
June 17th, 2007 at 10:20 pm
Omy goodness that is sooo sterotypin!
My goodness who ever made this needs 2 get a life and stap slaggin emos off!
i no ur not guna post this!
GET A HOBBBIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
June 28th, 2007 at 3:59 pm
Why the stereotypical-ness. It’s in hvery one of your fucking posts. Emo’s cut, emo’s cry…etc. GET A LIFE. With all the time you’ve been putting emo’s down you could be helping your boyfriend. Get him to a psyciatrist. Get him help It’ll only make your life easier. Call 1-800-SUICIDE and you can get help for him there.
June 29th, 2007 at 9:46 pm
people really are taking this too seriously.
i think your website it hilarious!
June 30th, 2007 at 12:23 pm
“GIRL DONT LISTEN TO YOURE DAMN BOYFRIEND.IF HE DONT LIKE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE THEN FORGET HIM OKAY.IM SERIOUS.YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO CHANGE WHO YOU ARE JUST BECAUSE YOURE BF THINKS YOU NEED TO FIT IN.I HAD AN EMO BF ONCE AND WE ONLY STAY TOGETHER FOR 5 MONTHS AND THEN HE DUMPED ME CAUSE I WASNT LIKE HIM. IF I WERE YOU I WOULD DUMP YOURE EMO GUY RIGHT NOW BEFORE YOU GET HURT.”
CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL!
July 26th, 2007 at 3:56 am
It’s hard not to be sterotypical about emo’s… they’re all “unique” people who dress the same and listen to shitty music, usually while screwing around with the same sex. They all do it. Don’t deny it…
August 1st, 2007 at 10:31 am
SANA MAY MGA TIPES PA PARA MAGING EMO-GIRL BECAUSE I WANT TO BE AN EMO-GIRL BECAUSE MY FRIEND FLORENCE WAS TISING ME BECAUSE HE WAS AN HIP-HOP BUT I WANT TO BE AN EMO-GIRL PLEASE………. HELP ME PLEASE……………..SEND ME HOW TO BE AN EMO-GIRL
- - - - - O O \ /
I I O O \ /
I I O O \ /
I I O O \/
I I- - - - O O
- - - - -
EMO
YOU
ARE
NUMBER
1
EMO-GIRL
&
EMO-BOY
ALL EMO PEOPLE! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
LOVE YOU ALLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
August 12th, 2007 at 4:40 am
emo | emo | emo
i think that this is a piece of shit!
following how to be an emo, so hilarious!
if you follow these,
then it’ll make you look like that your pretending
trying to fit in a specific social group
somewhat - “poser” i mean,..
anyway,
for you fuckin’ boyfriends dump them if you feel your not treated fare,..
that’s it!
September 2nd, 2007 at 9:56 pm
i had to laugh when i read this
September 5th, 2007 at 8:59 am
Okay, when you say that the only lipstick you should wear is black and to dye all of your clothes black, I have to say that what you’re describing is more gothic than emo.
September 5th, 2007 at 9:01 am
I would also like to say that I totally agree with XxDeadlyRosesxX. Very stereo-typical.
October 10th, 2007 at 10:29 pm
at least get a cheap life u deserve it
October 11th, 2007 at 12:16 am
“Okay, when you say that the only lipstick you should wear is black and to dye all of your clothes black, I have to say that what you're describing is more gothic than emo.”… Dude like I so agree! I’m emo nd all I wear for make up is REALLY dark, black eye-liner! Nd I don’t always wear black, just dark clothes. I think you got us emos confused with gothics!
Nd “princess EMO”, emo just depends on your life, I fuckn hate everyone around me nd they know it!!
-+-[emo chics are not homosexual, well not all of them! but not me! I think emo guys are hot! even if they got no "figure"!]-+-
yeah I may hate on everything but I don’t cry! I don’t cut either, If “that’s what emos supposed to do” then I guess my medicine for that is getting high!! hell yeah dude!
–++– Having Reality dreams, but living a nightmare!!!
October 21st, 2007 at 6:28 pm
Honestly i think your mocking the "emo society" what you typed is completly wrong,you have no ideal what your talking about and seriously.
i think you should shoot yourself.
you guys are all posers.
November 1st, 2007 at 1:58 am
You little bitch! I dress emo, all I put is eyeliner! My hair isn’t black, I have dirty blonde hair with dark purple streaks. Plus, I don’t even listen to music! The only emo band I like is November Blessing, and that is mostly because Randy Romance is hoooot. I listen to mostly rap, and rock. Like Green Day, Nirvana, etc… Just because I dress emo doesn’t make me a skinny little bitch who cuts themselves and cries 24/7. I am bipolar, and I am still not emo. God damn, you need to get a life! I thought this was going to be funny, but at the end you just offended me. Why don’t you get your head out of your ass and try telling me what emo is!
And I think you are nagging mostly goth.Plus you are getting emo confused with myspace whores! Emo is usually not in the scene. Myspace whores/scenesters include:
Jac Vanek
Hannah Beth
Zui Suicide
Audrey Kitching
All those fucking posers should go to hell! I agree in that part, but please don’t keep this so general and offend some of your readers.
P.S
My Chemical Romance does suck…
November 17th, 2007 at 8:00 pm
omg…this is so stupid….ya really….if you people do this…..the emo people will think that your a freakin poser.
November 19th, 2007 at 12:16 am
hell yea i agree with blah5 im emo and i dont cut and i dont cry about stupid shit. i smoke weed lol. and i dont wear any make-up or all black i acutally like color. and emo is a way of life there is not certian way to be emo. and who decided who is what? are you sayin that if i wanted to i can call someone a prep and they would be one? i always thought that you are what u believe you are. so if i think that im emo then i am fuck what u say. cos u dont know me. ur a bitch that doesnt have a life right. ahaha
March 20th, 2008 at 7:42 am
This is bullshit. Be yourself
May 4th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
PLZZ CNT ME HOW A EMO GIRL
June 7th, 2008 at 10:23 am
I think this is really funny. I only dress emo and the only fuckin makeup i wear is really thick black eye liner. The funeral part is really funny. What i hate bout you is that you say dat mcr are emo. Hey they re not! They re my favorite band and whoever insults them i just say: fuck you you fucking whore! Its really funny i liked it! Frankie iero and mcr 4 ever!
August 8th, 2008 at 3:52 am
okay you’re wrong about nearly everything.
and even though i dont like Pete Wentz or any one else of fall out boy.
HE PLAYS BASS DUMBASS!
there is nothing wrong with MCR either.
and yes. we mcr fans know you’re jealous
August 22nd, 2008 at 4:41 am
wow
August 22nd, 2008 at 5:16 am
gosh.. its not necessary killing yourself thoug your emo!! yeah i must admit i am emo but theres a big “BUT” here coz they always critize what i always wear and it sucks to listen!!
September 3rd, 2008 at 3:29 am
EMO IS MOSTLY A SITUATION NOT A STYLE. BUT IF YOU ALL WANT REAL ADVICE, PICK A BETTER SITE. THERE ARE SUCH THINGS CALLED EMO HAIRCUTS AND STUFF, BUT DONT JUST TRANSFORM TO AN EMO OVERNIGHT. YOU WILL MOST LIKELY BE LABELED AS A POSER INSTEAD. IM EMO AND I NEVER EVEN TRIED TO BE. EMO IS MOSTLY ABOUT EXPRESSING YOURSELF THROUGH YOUR LOOK OR YOUR ATTITUDE, SO MAKE SURE YOU’RE REALLY TRULY REFLECTING WHO YOU ARE. THEN YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. MY REPUTATION JUST BUILT ON ITS OWN. LIKE ME AND MY TWIN ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT PPL, WE DONT TRY TO LOOK THE SAME JUST BECAUSE PPL SAY WE SHOULD AND THAT’S HOW IT IS, YOU JUST HAVE TO BE YOURSELF. ANYWAYS, THERE ARE BETTER PLACES FOR REAL FACTS.
October 27th, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Well.. reading some of these comments disgusts me..
im an emo, and being an emo doesnt necessarily include cutting urself.
and yeh gurlz if ur bf dnt like u for who u are then HELL YEAH dump him! he should like you for who you are.
and in my world theres ”no such thing as trying to be an emo”
your an emo for simple being you. i never used to admit it.. but heyy no point hiding what you truly are.
But HELL YEAH this sit was hilarious
October 31st, 2008 at 12:32 am
this is the most sterotypical bull shit ever!!! i have tons of emo friends and they aren’t like that!!! FUCK U IGNORANT BITCH